The Dementor Game

So I came up with a silly game. It goes like this:

  1. Get quotes from Harry Potterbooks/movies about the Dementors
  2. Replace Dementors with Clients/Lawyers/Marketers/Telemarketers
  3. Replace Azkaban with the client’s office, if needed
  4. Hilarity ensues

Clients are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them. Even Muggles feel their presence, though they can’t see them. Get too near a client and every good feeling, every happy memory will be sucked out of you. If it can, the client will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself — soul-less and evil. You’ll be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life.”

“A word of caution: clients are vicious creatures. They will not distinguish between the one they hunt and the one who gets in their way. Therefore I must warn each and every one of you to give them no reason to harm you. It is not in the nature of a client to be forgiving.”

“Then, around the corner, gliding noiselessly, came Clients, ten or more of them, visible because they were of a denser darkness than their surroundings, with their black cloaks and their scabbed and rotting hands. Could they sense fear in the vicinity?”

“I didn’t think of Voldemort,” said Harry honestly. “I — I remembered those clients.”
“I see,” said Lupin thoughtfully. “Well, well … I’m impressed. That suggests what you fear most of all is — fear. Very wise, Harry.”

“A Client’s breath sounds rattling and like it’s trying to suck more than air out of a room.”

“A Client’s last and worst weapon is called the Client’s Kiss. The Client puts back its hood and clamps its jaws on the mouth of the victim and sucks out his soul, leaving him an empty shell, alive but completely, irretrievably gone.”





One response to “The Dementor Game”

  1. Charlie Wollborg Avatar

    Great idea but you used the wrong word. It’s much more realistic and frightening in you substitute the word “Congress”.